Living Under A Rock (def) - being oblivious or ignorant to what happens in the outside world by being overwhelmed and swept up in negative energy
Negative (def) - harmful, unwanted; marked by denial and/or absence
Negative energy comes in many forms. It can be unhappiness at work, someone giving you the side eye, financial instability, internal loss of direction or even the physical loss of a friend or loved one.
Yes, negative energy brings nothing but struggle, making it easy to get swept up by it.
For instance, when I get swept up by negativity, living under a rock becomes ideal. Hiding and distracting myself from whatever painful emotions or memories that this onslaught of negativity has brought up. And while I'm chilling under my rock, everything in the outside world is completely irrelevant.
The scary thing is that I don't even know how I wind up there until I've realized I've been living under it for a LONG while.
So if you've been living under a rock but just don't know it, here are three detectable signs in order to figure out how you got there in the first place.
#1 - Hide 'n'...No, Just Hide
Living under your rock is a prime example of hiding. Let's be honest here, when you're experiencing negativity, sometimes (1) you don't want anyone to know about what you're going through or (2) you don't want anyone to get involved.
Because what you are experiencing is yours to deal with.
And the people around may not have the answers you need to help you deal with your negative emotions.
So, if you want to handle this alone, do your own personal check. For example, are you avoiding people especially your close friends and loved ones? How long have you been avoiding them? What is causing that avoidance? Can you name other times when you just wanted to be by yourself? How are they similar or different?
Reclusiveness is beneficial when you need to get in touch with yourself. However, reflecting on your reasons behind your reclusiveness becomes a great way to gauge the severity of your problems. The more you reflect, the more identifiable your problems are in order to take small steps toward resolving your negativity.
#2 The Need for Distrac...Huh, What was I Saying?
Distractions are key to keeping you under your rock. Because distractions mask what you really need to deal with. For example, here are two of my favorite distractions.
Sleeping, which is another form of hiding, is by far the easiest distraction. Mostly because you can just sleep the day away until it becomes too late in the night to do anything else.
However, this sleep is not restful.
It is meant to leave you restless and more exhausted than when you went to sleep in the first place. So track your sleep. See how you feel before you go to bed and after you wake up. That way, you can track whether you are sleeping because you need your rest or you're sleeping because you're distracting yourself.
Consumption is not meant to heal you. It's just meant to solve your problems temporarily. Whether it's food, alcohol, overloading myself with work or shopping at the mall, sometimes I believed that the more I consumed, the "better" I would feel. Because, "better' is a temporary solution that distracts and masks you from your real issues.
So track your intake by determining what is necessary vs. excessive consumption in relation to your emotions. If you are intaking more than usual, check your emotions in order to know why you're eating this food or buying this product that you don't need.
Distractions are great ways to hide you from your problems. At times, you do need the distance in order to effectively have a clear and new perspective on any situation. But, just be mindful of your distractions. That way, you won't become overwhelmed when it comes time to deal with your problems.
#3 On Autopilot
The last sign is your body and mind being on autopilot. Being on autopilot, which is another form of hiding and distraction, is just going through the motions of the day to day. A way to hide from your issues while attempting to get things done.
Mainly, it's just to keep yourself busy.
Because, usually, busyness equals having purpose or drive. At least, that's what it would seem. Yet, you can be busy and have no purpose. Because, you're doing it just to do it. Basically, you're zombifying yourself.
So track your commitments. Make a list. In one column, write what you're committed to and responsible for right now. In the other, write how each commitment gives you purpose. Ultimately, this exercise will help you reflect on why you took on this commitment in the first place.
During my time under my rock, I committed myself to designing 40hrs a week for a mortgage company, interning 15hrs at a non-profit, interning 15hrs at a real estate agency and writing daily content for BARE. And by the time I realized I had no energy or purpose to put my all into anything anymore, I just ended up going through the motions. Until, I decided to let go of some commitments. And I ended up letting go of the one thing that actually gave me purpose, which was building this BARE community.
Your energy and purpose are precious. So if your rock is causing you to let go of your purpose for temporary distractions and solutions, it may be time to crawl from underneath it.
With babies, some walk immediately and don't need to crawl at all. But with most, crawling is a major form of action. So if you want to start crawling from under your rock, reflect on how you got there in order to start taking the small steps towards crawling out and walking away from the negativity.